Marvel vs. DC

I once lost half a day arguing Astronauts vs. Roman Centurions, an argument that descended into friendship-ending shouts, and then lost another four hours the next day when someone asked what we had been arguing about the day before.

It is a particular joy of living in the genre world that we can take things seriously that don’t actually matter to any degree at all. And before you jump to any conclusions about “what nerds do,” I’ve had even more violent arguments about things like Outlaws vs. Nashville in Austin bars that have lots of glass bottles handy in case a discussion breaks out.

If you watch Ken Burns’ baseball documentary, you’ll hear someone from way back when say, “Baseball matters because Americans need something to kick about without actually meaning it.” Yep. I quit my lifelong fandom of the Houston Astros when they switched from National to American League in a fit of much throwing of things. But does baseball really matter? No. Sports don’t matter. That’s why we love them so much. They feel important when we’re watching them, but when we turn off the TV or leave the stadium nothing has actually changed.

Marvel vs DC is another such hill on which we choose to die, a death no less important than many others, but one that seems to me to be particularly pointless. You like what you like. That’s how life works. Why get into a fistfight over arugula or cilantro?

Trust me, I wouldn’t waste your time with a discussion so trivial.  This post is about Marvel vs DC movies.

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Back!

So the last eight months has been too confusing to do much on this site. Between selling our house, moving into temporary quarters and then moving half way across the country to San Diego, I could just barely spare the brain cycles to finish up the final edit on Dark Adapted.

Speaking of which, hire an editor. Not a grammar editor, you can do that yourself with one small book (The Elements of Style), but a STORY editor. I’ve done two passes with my story editor, Jessica de Bruyn trueimaginary@gmail.com, and my story problems are gone. Trust me, you think you don’t have plot holes or cardboard characters, but you do. You just can’t see them.

So, anyway, Dark Adapted is now trickling out to agents and that is the last I will say about it until something positive happens.

Meanwhile, I’ll be back on my genre stuff again just like before.

Ready Player One

I listened to the audio book of Ready Player One so much that even while watching the movie I kept hearing Wil Wheaton’s voice whenever Wade Watts spoke. The 80s was my favorite decade while it was happening and now that I’m older its image has been buffed and shined by that glorious polish known as nostalgia. Which is just my way of saying I am the exact target audience for the book and, maybe, the movie.

But here’s the odd thing about going in to see the movie: I could tell from the trailers that they had changed a lot of stuff… and I was fine with that.

I read The Shining just as many times as I read RPO, but I went into the theater expecting to see the book transliterated to the screen without changes. The result wasn’t pretty even though I grew to love the movie for itself over time. That wasn’t me going into see RPO. I had read the book often enough that I was ready to see other stuff happen as long as they told the same general story.

So the question of whether Spielberg’s Ready Player One is a success in my eyes falls heavily on whether I feel they managed to tell the story while at the same time making all kinds of crazy changes to energize a movie audience.

Spoilers for the book and movie Ready Player One follow.

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Jumanji

TL;DR: Sometimes it’s fine to just enjoy yourself at the theater. Cast aside your obsessions and go have a laugh with this gentle, good natured movie.

Spoilers for Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle follow.

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The Last Jedi

TL;DR: A lot of hardcore fans take exception to this movie for daring to branch out in a new direction. I am all for it. This is a great, fun movie that reminds me of the originals.

Spoilers for The Last Jedi follow.

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The Dark Tower

TL;DR: This is the worst “adaption” of a Stephen King novel since he forced filmmakers to take his name off Lawnmower Man

I’m not much of a fantasy guy, but I love the Dark Tower series. This movie has nothing to do with those books.

Spoilers for The Dark Tower follow.

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Good Things Are Coming

I’ve talked way too much about how much I love Ready Player One and I know that some people have a problem with it, but I love it and now that I’ve seen the teaser trailer for the movie I just simply cannot wait to see it.

Annihilation on the other the other hand, I’ve only written about once, right after I finished the trilogy and all I could talk about then was what a weird head space it put me in. But it’s a magnetic series of books and the idea of them making a good movie out of it seemed impossible – like The Shining impossible. But the trailer looks really good:

Justice League

TL;DR: It’s a mess but there are some good moments and it’s worth it just to see Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman again.

Spoilers for Justice League follow.

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Thor: Ragnarok

There’s not a lot to say about this movie except to say it’s not Just Another Marvel Movie (JAMM). It’s a lot of fun and very funny and a breath of fresh air in the constant onslaught of superhero movies.

Rumor has it that Taika Waititi, the director, was tired of seeing the same hero movie being made over and over and decided to go in a different direction and that Chris Hemsworth was sick of his character being the brooding dull boy in a class of far more interesting heroes.

So they changed that shit up. And I mean, in a big way. This is the most fun I’ve had with Thor in a long time. Highly recommended.

Colossal

tl;dr: Don’t. Just don’t. Stream Get Smart (2008) instead.

I’m just going to come out and say it. I like Anne Hathaway. I think she is very good actress and emotive and beautiful and I tend to want to see the movies she’s in. I don’t understand the hate but then I don’t know her personally.

I’m also a big fan of Jason Sudeikis. We’re the Millers (2013) is one of the most criminally underrated comedies of all time.

As a time travel movie junkie, I would be remiss if I didn’t add that one of my all time favorites, just after FAQ About Time Travel (2009), is Timecrimes (2007) which was directed by Nacho Vigolondo who directed this piece of shit.

Spoilers for Colossal follow…

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