Ready Player One

I listened to the audio book of Ready Player One so much that even while watching the movie I kept hearing Wil Wheaton’s voice whenever Wade Watts spoke. The 80s was my favorite decade while it was happening and now that I’m older its image has been buffed and shined by that glorious polish known as nostalgia. Which is just my way of saying I am the exact target audience for the book and, maybe, the movie.

But here’s the odd thing about going in to see the movie: I could tell from the trailers that they had changed a lot of stuff… and I was fine with that.

I read The Shining just as many times as I read RPO, but I went into the theater expecting to see the book transliterated to the screen without changes. The result wasn’t pretty even though I grew to love the movie for itself over time. That wasn’t me going into see RPO. I had read the book often enough that I was ready to see other stuff happen as long as they told the same general story.

So the question of whether Spielberg’s Ready Player One is a success in my eyes falls heavily on whether I feel they managed to tell the story while at the same time making all kinds of crazy changes to energize a movie audience.

Spoilers for the book and movie Ready Player One follow.

Read More


TL;DR: Sometimes it’s fine to just enjoy yourself at the theater. Cast aside your obsessions and go have a laugh with this gentle, good natured movie.

Spoilers for Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle follow.

Read More

The Last Jedi

TL;DR: A lot of hardcore fans take exception to this movie for daring to branch out in a new direction. I am all for it. This is a great, fun movie that reminds me of the originals.

Spoilers for The Last Jedi follow.

Read More

The Dark Tower

TL;DR: This is the worst “adaption” of a Stephen King novel since he forced filmmakers to take his name off Lawnmower Man

I’m not much of a fantasy guy, but I love the Dark Tower series. This movie has nothing to do with those books.

Spoilers for The Dark Tower follow.

Read More

Good Things Are Coming

I’ve talked way too much about how much I love Ready Player One and I know that some people have a problem with it, but I love it and now that I’ve seen the teaser trailer for the movie I just simply cannot wait to see it.

Annihilation on the other the other hand, I’ve only written about once, right after I finished the trilogy and all I could talk about then was what a weird head space it put me in. But it’s a magnetic series of books and the idea of them making a good movie out of it seemed impossible – like The Shining impossible. But the trailer looks really good:

Justice League

TL;DR: It’s a mess but there are some good moments and it’s worth it just to see Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman again.

Spoilers for Justice League follow.

Read More

Thor: Ragnarok

There’s not a lot to say about this movie except to say it’s not Just Another Marvel Movie (JAMM). It’s a lot of fun and very funny and a breath of fresh air in the constant onslaught of superhero movies.

Rumor has it that Taika Waititi, the director, was tired of seeing the same hero movie being made over and over and decided to go in a different direction and that Chris Hemsworth was sick of his character being the brooding dull boy in a class of far more interesting heroes.

So they changed that shit up. And I mean, in a big way. This is the most fun I’ve had with Thor in a long time. Highly recommended.


tl;dr: Don’t. Just don’t. Stream Get Smart (2008) instead.

I’m just going to come out and say it. I like Anne Hathaway. I think she is very good actress and emotive and beautiful and I tend to want to see the movies she’s in. I don’t understand the hate but then I don’t know her personally.

I’m also a big fan of Jason Sudeikis. We’re the Millers (2013) is one of the most criminally underrated comedies of all time.

As a time travel movie junkie, I would be remiss if I didn’t add that one of my all time favorites, just after FAQ About Time Travel (2009), is Timecrimes (2007) which was directed by Nacho Vigolondo who directed this piece of shit.

Spoilers for Colossal follow…

Read More

Blade Runner 2049 vs Kingsman: Golden Circle

TL;DR: Someone call Topher Grace and tell him to find his copy of Final Cut Pro. Blade Runner 2049 is a good movie and an excellent sequel, but it’s at least fifty minutes too long. Kingsman, on the other hand, is a lot of fun.

Spoilers for Blade Runner 2049 and Kingsman: The Golden Circle follow.

Read More

Star Trek: Discovery

TL;DR: I love it so Trekkers will probably hate it {shrug}

I grew up on The Original Series, actually watched it as a kid during its first run on our brand new color television,  and I liked the first two movies (yes, even Star Trek: The Motion Picture), but I never watched The Next Generation or Deep Space 9, nor did I watch any of the movies with those casts.

To be honest, I came to the conclusion in the 90s that TOS was dated and didn’t hold up well and that Star Trek, in general, had gotten bogged down into a talky, Shakespeare-quoting swamp of under plotted over acting. In other words, if you’re going to give me a show with spaceships, I’d better see them blowing each other apart in short order.

I was much more a Heinlein kid than an Asimov kid growing up. I wanted big thinks, yes, but I wanted them to happen with blasters blasting and lasers… eh… lasing.

It’s too simple a case to make that I’m a Star Wars fan vs. Star Trek fan, because I think Star Wars got way too thick with the mumbo jumbo and mysticism. So much so they began to verge on being sword and sorcery with light sabers.

Essentially, there wasn’t enough action in my Star Trek and not enough deep thought in my Star Wars.

As I’ve said on here before, I think the 2009 Star Trek reboot may be the perfect film for me. If I’m going to a desert island, I’m taking that movie and Joe Vs. The Volcano and Scott Pilgrim Vs The World with me. I can watch it over and over. As a matter of fact, having typed its name in the previous sentence, I am now required to go watch it again right now. BRB.

Okay, rousing! Such a great film. And so hated by so many Star Trek fans. Why? Not enough talky-talky, too much action. “You can change the names of the characters and it’s just a generic action movie,” is a common complaint. I disagree, but that’s why it’s so good that movies aren’t compulsory.

So now comes a new TV show called Star Trek: Discovery and I have to admit that I had little interest in watching it. Knowing that it was no more than a bargaining chip for CBS to increase subscriber fees to cable/satellite providers mixed with the disappointing experience of Star Trek: Enterprise, I just wasn’t ready to make the commitment. Certainly not enough to subscribe to CBS’s weak ass streaming service that apparently has exactly one show on it.

Now having seen it, I am immediately addicted. This is the best looking Star Trek TV show ever made, I can guarantee you that. It’s also blessed with amazing writing and top notch acting. I’ve only caught the first two episodes so I haven’t seen Jason Isaacs’ character yet, but knowing his work from Harry Potter and The OA, I’m not worried.

Love the new Klingons! This is the warrior race we’ve heard so much about. Scary as hell and about as easy to negotiate with as ISIS.

The character of Michael Burnham is an excellent guide into the Trek universe even if you know nothing about it. Having been raised Vulcan is nice because it basically puts her thinking at odds with everyone else’s.

And setting the story on the verge of going to a war footing is a good idea. The scene where the helmsman, stunned from one of those exploding keyboards Star Fleet is so fond of, says, “Why are we fighting? We’re Star Fleet. We’re explorers” is a nice touch.

All in all, I’m captivated and eagerly anticipating new episodes which can only mean, I assume, that true Trek fans are eating their own livers over how much they hate this show.